Depressed...

I've been feeling quite depressed lately. I use to think I was depressed when I was younger. During my teenage years. But this is different. Back then it was just "I hate the world and everyone hates me, I dont want to live". But I think most teenagers get that way and I was upset and struggling with school and myself. But this is different. I don't hate anything or anyone, except maybe myself. I just....I don't feel anything. I have no motivation or energy to do anything at all. I mean last night at work, while I was delivering papers, I got this idea to go through everything in my room and throw out anything I don't need anymore. I planned it all out and everything. But then I got home and just said "screw it..." and I've just been on the computer like I am everyday. I am going through some things in life right now that are cuasing this. Financial problems, trying to find a new job, struggling with my weight and feeling quite lonely (I've never had a boyfriend so I've always felt this way but it's becoming an increasing feeling...).

I'm 23 years old. I should be out with friends and having fun and living out the best years of my life. But I'm not. My life consists of working at night from 2am-6am then coming home, handing my car off to my mom so she can use it to go to her job, then I'm home all day. I go to bed at 3pm and then wake up to repeat it all over again. I have no money or nice clothes to wear in public so even if a friend were to come pick me up to do something, I couldn't. I also don't want to be seen in public due to the eczema on my face. It has made me even more self-conscious. Not to mention the weight I've gained which I'm desperately trying to lose, but being with me being such a food addict, that's not an easy task.

I'm not looking for any help or sympathy here. I just wanted to put out what's been going on with me lately. I'm sure I'm not the only person out there who feels like this. Everyone keeps telling me "don't worry, it'll get better".....I wish they'd stop saying that.